Page 43 - Fyne Times Spring 2014
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‘more at home’. Unfortunately, I can’t do
that at work, although I am able to wear
more neutral clothing and have spoken to
colleagues about my own identity and queer
issues generally. I have to say, people have
been really positive.”
But going against a society that is split into
two very clear camps can be tricky. In their
day-to-day life, Sam sometimes encounters
some difficulties. “I use disabled loos
where possible as they are gender-neutral.
However, I use female loos otherwise and
I regularly get challenged because people
think I’m a guy in the ladies. Mostly I
think it is funny, but sometimes I feel a
bit awkward. Also, I am a life coach and
I find it really difficult when I meet with
new clients for the first time. I use neutral
pronouns for work, but I often feel like
people are confused by my gender when
I turn up. I find that really challenging
and it makes it hard to market my work
effectively.”
Pronouns are a difficult area and sentences
without using ‘he’ or ‘she’ need more
thought. As yet, there is no recognised
gender-neutral pronoun and so ‘they’ is
often used instead. Some non-binary gender
or genderqueer people also prefer their
name to be used instead of a pronoun.
How ‘gender’ exists in the first place has
been debated for many years. While the
prevailing thought a few years ago was that
we are born different and there are certain
gendered behaviours we can’t get away
from, in more recent times psychologists
and sociologists have moved more towards
the idea that a lot of gender differences are
created by society and don’t relate much to
biology at all.
Trousers and skirts are a good example of
how gender is formed. While our culture
may say that skirts are for girls, there is no
physical reason why this is so. In fact, men
traditionally wear something resembling
a skirt or a dress in most countries around
the world. But trousers have undergone a
fascinating revolution. Until 100 years ago,
a woman in a pair of trousers was socially
unacceptable in many western countries, yet
today, jeans and trousers are as suitable for
women as they are for men. For those who
believe gender is ‘socially constructed’, such
things are evidence that the rules can be
changed.
But gender itself can change in different
cultural contexts too. Anthropologists
have identified cultures where there is an
accepted third or even fourth and fifth
gender. India, Bangladesh and Pakistan all
have the option of a third gender and some
Indonesian cultures have five clear genders
to choose from. Native American tribes also
have a tradition of ‘two-spirited’ people who
do not fall into a specific gender and often
perform specialist roles such as healing.
It seems clear that throughout time and
space there have been people who do not
fall into either gender category. In modern
psychology, there is now a shift away from
the simple classification of ‘male’ or ‘female’
and an acceptance that personalities have a
greater or lesser mixture of the two. Slowly,
gender is becoming less binary.
“I think there are lots of people who have
accepted the gender roles which society
has imposed on them without much
questioning.” Said Sam. “It may be that
they are comfortable in them, or it may be
that they aren’t. I wouldn’t like to say either
way really, as I can only really know what it
feels like to be me, and not what it feels like
to be someone else.”
If you want to read more about non-binary
genders, a good starting point is
“I think there are lots of people who have accepted the gender roles
which society has imposed on them without much questioning.”
